I need to maintain this level of balance. I feel good The relationships in my life are good I am being productive with projects and work. I am dating multiple men. The last few days I’ve mostly spent indoors. Watching shows, listening to radio, being sick and achy. Tonight, today, after some medication I feelContinue reading “Self-medicating “
Well I started out down a dirty road Started out all alone And the sun went down as I crossed the hill And the town lit up, the world got still I’m learning to fly, but I ain’t got wings Coming down is the hardest thing Well the good ol’ days may not return AndContinue reading “Learning to fly”
Some days it’s hard for me to get out of bed. Today is one of those days
It took 41 minutes after midnight before my mind wandered to thoughts of you. 41 whole minutes! I think that’s pretty damn good! Happy New Year to me!
things will never change and my worst fears will come alive.
fuck you for doing this to me fuck me for allowing you. fuck you for making me think i’m not good enough. fuck you for carrying along. though, you make my insides come alive, passion, heat, hollow.
I’m stoned and I want to text you. 10 years and i’m still repeating the patterns. get stoned, spew my guts to you, have you reject me once again. tonight i will not give in. April 2020 update: Turns out rejection is how I feel loved. This is my comfort, and it’s why I’ve continuedContinue reading “I’m stoned”
I told him we can’t be friends, I told him it has to be all or nothing. I told him it would be a charade if we carried on. He understood. He said his feelings for me are deep, but ultimately, they are unromantic. Biggest sigh of my life* Good night.
Oops, I did it again. I put my heart and feelings on the line to be rejected. I will never understand why he doesn’t want me the way I want him. I will never understand how he doesn’t see and feel the same things I do. I am so fucking awesome. How come he doesn’tContinue reading “Deep gulps & small talk”